To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.
Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.
When you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
— Wilson Mizner
Literature
Treat a whore like a lady and a lady like a whore.
Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.
— Wilson Mizner
Friendship
Be nice to people on the way up because you'll meet them on the way down.
— Wilson Mizner
Friendship
A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.
Harry Thaw shot the wrong architect.